I like how the fucker stands up all slow and epic like its gonna do some super fuggen awesome metal gear solid shit then…
then this shit.
This is the second time I’ve seen a version of this post and it is never not funny!
OMG I just got that.
…and half the time they will springboard off the first vertical surface they come near, trot back to you, and insist you do it again.
while this is true of most cats my cat is such a dumb I have dropped her and she’s kind of just… flomped on the floor for a second before recovering her dignity.
I love all of my shitty internet friends. You’re all asshole and I hate you
ugh i want to get really uncomfortably rich and then just. go around and anonymously donate huge amounts of money to people for things like HEY youre trying to move away from your abusive parents?? BAM 10 thousand mystery dollars oh whats that your dog needs surgery?? BAM paid for hey you cant afford to go to that con with your friends?? BAM better get your cosplay ready you fucking nerd
I wonder how many stranger’s stories we make it into? You know, maybe someone saw you in passing and told their friends about how pretty the girl in the lavender sweater was. Or maybe they overheard you say a joke and repeated it to their friend, confessing that they heard it from some guy at the store.
a CEO walks into his office “any messages?” he asks his assistant
“two anons want to know who tom petty is and one just says ‘post your ballsack’”
“got it. check my dashboard”
“that skeleton gif you like is back again”
he rubs his chin pensively “mm. reblog that”
god bless the german language for having an insult like arschgeige
That’s my language, ladies and gentlemen.
thank you, thank you, we’ll be here all week
How do dick pics make u feel?
Back when I was younger and more ignorant and misinformed than I am now, one of my exes literally made me feel guilty sometimes when he got a boner and I didn’t want to “take care of him”. He claimed that it caused him a lot of pain and he said that his doctor had actually said he couldn’t leave himself in that state or else he could damage himself…. So made me feel like I HAD to give him relief even when I really did not desire to. And that sucked.
Wait… it DOESN’T hurt them?
Boys get boners all the time for no reason. No, it doesn’t hurt them. If any boy tries to tell you otherwise, run away as fast as you can because he’s lying to you for the sake of his penis.
No penis is more important than you because you are a whole person and a penis is just a spongy flab o’ flesh.
Hahaha deff not I get boners constantly.
Anything causes them
Favorite answer so far.
Boners can get to the point at which they hurt (mind, this takes time, and either a lot of working it, a lot of teasing it, or both). However, once that point is reached? Getting off will also hurt. If it’s actually hurting, getting off will not stop it from hurting, and in some cases will even make it worse.
Generally speaking, barring certain fetishes and types of masochism, once a boner actually hurts, guys will want you to stop fucking touching it because touching it is painful. We’re talking about the most sensitive part of a guy’s body. The very idea of it being in pain makes us simultaneously wince, cringe, and instinctively shield it with our hands. Guys who say it hurts and so you need to get them off? Yeah, they’re not in pain. They’re just horny and selfish. Also fairly stupid, since not only do they not realize the inherent flaw in treating another human like an unfeeling sex toy and generally hurting their relationship with said other human…but they also apparently don’t realize that denial of immediate pleasure can actually lead to better, more intense pleasure later. And that’s just on the physical level, to say nothing of psychological and emotional levels, which are also as important in a healthy, fun, enjoyable sex life as they are in a loving, caring, respectful relationship with your fellow humans.